Author Topic: To Spank Or Not To Spank.  (Read 2493 times)

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Offline CilmiSabca

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To Spank Or Not To Spank.
« on: April 04, 2012, 01:08:20 PM »
For the first time, you are like to be upset by rather  than proud of your offspring's exploits. And for the first time the question of discipline has probably come up in your home. The timing is right. Waiting to introduce discipline into child's life much later than ten months could make the task much more difficult; trying to have done so much earlier, before memory was developed, would have been futile.
Why discipline a baby? First of all, to instill a concept of right and wrong.
Though spanking has been passed on from generation to generation in many families, most experts agree that it is not, and never has been, an effective way to discipline a child. Children who are spanked may refrain from repeating a misdemeanor rather than risk another spanking, but they obey only as long as the risk is there. They often don't like or respect the people who hit them and frequently don't learn to differentiate right from wrong (only what they get spanked for and what they don't get spanked for)   a prime goal of discipline.
Spanking also has many negative aspects. For one, it teaches violence. Child beaters and wife beaters are almost always former victims of beatings themselves, and many a child who whacks a peer and is asked, "Where did you learn that?" will respond with "From my mother (or father)."  For another, spanking teaches  children that the best way to settle disputes is with force, and denies them the chance to learn alternative, less hurtful, routes to dealing with anger and frustration. It also represents an abuse of power by a very large, strong party against a very small, weak one. And it can lead to serious injury of a child, often unintentionally, particularly when it is done in anger. Spanking after the anger is cooled, though it may do less physical damage, seems even more questionable than lashing out in the heat of the moment. It is certainly more cruelly calculated, and it is even less effective in correcting behavior.
If it's inadvisable for a parent to spank a child, it is even more inadvisable for another person to do so. Though with a parent a child is usually secure in the knowledge that the spanking is being administered by someone who cares; with another person there's generally no such security. Sitters, teachers, and others who tend to your child should be instructed NEVER to strike him or her or administer any form of physical punishment.
Most experts (and parents) would agree that a sound smack on the hand or the bottom may be warranted in a dangerous situation to get a serious message across to a child too young to understand words -  for example, when a toddler wanders out into the street or approaches a hot stove and a stern reprimand doesn't do the trick.      Once comprehension is established, however, physical force is no longer justifiable.
Studies have found that:
# Boys are spanked more than girls;
# Mothers spank more than fathers;
# Toddlers and preschoolers are spanked most often.
# Parents from lower income groups spank more often;
# Parents who have more education are less likely to spank;
# Religious conservatives are more favorable towards spanking;
# Some groups, based on cultural and/or ethnic background are more likely to spank their children.ยค
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